The Legend of Tio Chubuardo

Origin of Tio Chubuardo.

Tio Chubuardo, b. Chubardo Jimenez de la Valle Radícal, was as we all know the famous revolutionary who led the awesomely radical Short Shorts uprising of 2023...that's right, that's in the future and we're talking about it like it's in the past...no big whoop...

Toss That Shit On

Burritos bigger than a baby (NOT baby burritos).
On your neck (replacing cologne, attracting dem hunnies).
Your Saturday Night Partay Shoes (If you want to crushnihiliate dance floors).
Bacon (only way to make it even better).

Stats

10 out of 10 dudes said vegetarians who use Tio Chubuardo are 45% easier to be around.
Guys who brush their teeth with Tio Chubuardo have more are likely to have twins or triplets. Consider yourself warned.

The Secret’s In The Sauce

8 generations of pure Mexican jalapeño cross-breeding. Our scientists have never been published in an academic journal, collectively have 0 PhDs hanging above their mantles, and don’t believe there’s a difference between a pair of genes and a pair of jorts. But they do know one thing – TASTE.